STRAIGHT LINES.

When I was little kid like somewhere around the fourth grade, I was packed off in the afternoons of the summer vacation to a painting class.

There I remember,sitting on the ground in a circle around our teacher,a group of about ten.

The only sounds in the beginning being those of shuffling and sharpening of pencils and opening of pencil boxes, repeatedly erasing and retrying how to get our pencils to move along a straight line,highlighting it clearly,giving it definition visible to sight,making them stand up from the white oblivion.Magic.

 I also remember a very plump girl’s skirt that decided to do a Marilyn Monroe, just as she bent to pick up her pencil box to pack up for the day,a last minute sway, positioned me directly in line for a torpedo attack,were gaseous warfare to be declared.

Wrong positioning, but this time it was just kill by sight as the gentle breeze generated by the slow moving blades of the wooden fan,lifted the light cloth off its designated camouflaging position.The other sounds that Ithen remember are shocked intakes and two boys giggling away at the back.

Hence from my painting class I took away straight lines and a dimpled thigh,forever.

Straight lines have a way of evading most of us,it’s a difficult concept to lift off from a painting book and enforce it,over and above our itching little,twitching bodies.

Starting from school assembly lines which will be crooked till the class we graduate out from. Even though our monitor is entrusted with the sole job of military discipline, children shuffling in curved assembly lines remains a global phenomenon.

However from school on, most countries pick up and head straight off to the top of the line,and that’s where our little India gets confused. How to pick up and walk straight,is a genuinely puzzling concept to the common Indian,brought up on the 'tedhi ungli' lore and no its not a concept diluted with all the Whiskey in the system,and its not just in the poor confused Y chromosome in the family who gets everything first, it’s a general affliction or epidemic of Popeye adrenalin which works on the principle ‘so what’s wrong with a little shoving and pushing, if you are fighting for birth rights,while paying ‘chutta’{small change}first in a paan shop.”

Straight lines are they a personal stumbling block or a national stumbling mammoth disaster???

Its almost as we we struggle against asphyxiation if we are left grappling behind.

 In the Metro Queue or in the bank ATM line, thankfully I have graduated from running onto buses ,slipping past stinking shirts slippery with sweat, wading through masses of people,trusting people with my two rupees for the ticket,(yes it has been a long time) seeing the two rupees get relayed across the bus,and thankfully clutch the relayed ticket back, you would think that the amount of trust generated would put you at ease,yes it does, unless you start feeling the eyes.I am fighting a war on two fronts,one my peripheral vision is watching out for the cheeky men in the line behind me trying to get the seat right in front of me either willing to brush past, or happily brush against.Not really discriminating against the end results, both are great and sail his boat,or launch it should I say?

But its in car jams that we get seriously challenged to remember what’s straight…Its all those cars that creep past you to stand onto your right in a traffic jam,blocking a four lane two way road by nearly just climbing into the tree that stands planted well off the road,leaves saluting in the opposite direction,waiting to welcome traffic from the other side which would trickle through if it ever makes its way past our smiling neighbours,who mock our sedateness,through the car windows.We suddenly loose them,with head reeling speed,apparently their peripheral vision works fine too that or the goading by all the co passengers at the 5 mm opening in front,activates the accelerator.We loose them from our right wing only to be replaced by another like minded brother, who has managed to squeeze ahead to our right exploiting his 5 mm opening too.and because we are still reeling from the speedy exit of the first one we miss the celebratory glances of our new neighbours.

I Love straight,straight men,straight shots,straight flights,straight lines(except in my cupboard,where shapeshifting is a phenomenon that Stephenie Meyer could have picked up the concept from)

I also sometimes wonder at the missing straight when I am zealously guarding my spot in the metro ticket queue,which is absolutely ripe for a hostile take over if I slip my guard even for a bit,or in a hospital, waiting for the doctor to give me the time of the day,freeing himself of people who self importantly waltz into his office,I keep expecting them to be spat out,but they somehow get swallowed inside for the longest gestation period,they spin out with a very healthy unrepentant walk,right by our frothing brimming angry presence,only to ignore us in their healthy peachy existence,when our angry redness is getting enhanced only by our 103 degree Celsius fever.

 But focusing on the brushing past, somehow when the lazy, ambling generally snail paced regular,pot bellied Indian man,and why only man, Saree clad,soft spoken,chappal yielding Durga’s also reveal themselves when they  find themselves encountered by a straight line.

 They discover in themselves a propelling urgent desire to break free,its as if centuries of mothers food fed lathered with Ghee,and not being dramatic,maa ka doodh and tea served in bed,suddenly manifests itself in a display of speed and alertness and desire to be the winner in the race of money withdrawl in ATM queues,these Alpha males or Chappal wielding, feminist dialogue spouting,mini spitfires validate their presence, through these acts of breaking free from the system.seemingly reveling in this feeling of freedom of shoving which comes as fresh air, for their bound visceral mundane lives. Minor Seismic Vicissitudes of life.

 The Mystery of the straight lines is a question asked to me by many a foreign travelers to our country whose unwritten bible rules are never to get in the way of an overzealous Indian in a queue,if they are here just for two weeks,make way.

The other rule is that,if you are here for the whole six seasons, then the only way around is to perfect the snooty,ice cold stare that does seem to effectively freeze the semi ambitious muddlers, and part time line offenders.

A  question we most ardently discuss sitting on bar stools, flocking down from the celestial heights of our glassy,day chambers, sipping Cosmopolitans and Bloody Mary’s,bearing in mind we are all  of Aryan-Dravidian descent, and still 100% Indian, is “why can Indians not stay in lines?

This question we discuss animatedly,owning the rights to the critical subject,thanks to our genetic descents which are from the geographically same area,as the country we vote in.(hopefully vote in).

Each member provides deep insight into the psyche that needs to change at the grass roots,Or deeper still, the discussion of the 1.27 billion population being like a stumbling elephant.

(The poor elephant is now over burdened by the Indian heritage, he has been stumbling for so long in its epitomizing description of Indian-ness that the poor tusker may never wander onto the straight path,because it is scarred by the mammoth problems of New age India.)

Pressing the gelled hair back the guy on my table (not my regular company) passes a smile at all of us,probably doing a mental hi Five to his un-gelled,uncontrolled,savage ape man,alter ego, at  successfully distracting the waiter off his projected straight path. He tucks in a 500 note in his pocket ensuring a completely warped path for the waiter for the rest of the evening ,directly translating the slick gesture of monetary kindness to our placement STRAIGHT to the Top of the restaurants food chain.

I should really tell him off mmmmmmm next time..100% pakka,shachiiiiii…Ma kasam….;)))))whenever my genetic right to assert itself critically of its geographic genetic neighbours’ wakes up from the deliciousness of my watered and full existence.Next time i will come straight to the point.

LIFE IS ALSO WHAT HAPPENS INSTEAD……..

 We are a generation that can attach ourselves to clouds and then probably float down in our dreams, sliding off the edges of a rain drop as it splashes into an ocean. Which is probably just having a bad day sloshing around in god’s gigantic wine glass (sorry, but my God is a Greek epicurean God!!)

We are also an all knowing Apple and Banana {republic;)} following, Right here,right now, if not,  I will Google you here and I know exactly what I want, generation.(not very far ahead of Adam & Eve and apes)

Generationally challenged, In my dreams I was obsessively crunching over unknown similar looking pebbles, striding purposefully towards a coffee shop, imagining losing myself and my lips inside a foam that is sprinkled with nutmeg and cinnamon, just so and finally my tongue discovering that hot bite of chocolate beneath the foamy surface Ahh!!( I do not like coffee),but what I know is that the door I am opening has got me exactly where I want. I stand inside the shop breathe in the aroma ( I love the smell of coffee). I feel I have arrived.

 With this feeling I simulate my emotions to mirror a smug cat, with creamed whiskers.

To be where you want exactly, is a placement in the dimensions of the universe that is governed by equations, which are a function of Time , space and variables.

Now what happens when you do not fit? What happens when your purposeful walk is halted by a closed sign?All those images on hologram mode star trek style come crashing around, to the pebble level around your feet.

Do we take it as a sign that the equation was not meant to factor in the heat of the hot chocolate,do we quietly stride away?

Variable in question now is intensity.For me because I have a vivid imagination,the images are like a live news flash with HD CLARITY and DOLBY sound effects, and as we are the google on my smart phone generation So(if the time factor in the equation permits)I Google walk following my nose (please refrain from images of a monkey sniffing in the air,it’s a more refined gentle sniffing walk,preferably insert images of sauntering diva)  I walk till I find myself holding handles of a door that has an open sign.I walk because I know opening those doors will get me exactly where I want.

If I factor in a walk along with an over active, desirous imagination,then the conclusion my dream would reach would still be the same. This time though the governing elements were different from knowledge of the path and everyday Hi- Tech autopilot. The equation is also variable, we realize. It also exists in multiple dimensions and there is never one correct answer and there is never one correct way of getting it right.

This time a different approach gave me the same smug cat look albeit five minutes down the dream lane.

However at the end of any timed , evaluated dream sequence,(maybe you dream of winning Jet Ski’s and lucky drawing Louis Vuitton’s,or just a constant rain shower of Tom Cruise,Brad Pitt and Bradley Cooper’s,or of simple men who cook you meals ,while pouring you wine,its just dreams after all) 

After giving it our best shot(not sling shot,more the dart board focused shot)if we still do not arrive at the conclusion we desire, even after factoring in the constant and variable elements like knowledge,Dedication, hard work,love, luck,black magic,voodoo,magic charms,and in my case warped Google Maps. I realize when we get our test papers back that the “what” was wrong and I was as they say barking up the wrong tree. And no amount of astrological charts will align me with the path A.

But as every solution is an answer to a WHAT. The journalistic “what” in this is a very important point, we are all levitating around.

The need is then to look around and discover the INSTEAD WHAT,or Path B.

And work on that. Maybe it was Hot chocolate I wanted but something else I NEEDED.

Transmuting of desires is a lesson rigidity will do well to learn from.

As I condense down in my dreams, eventually, clutching that rain drop (holding my hot chocolate with one hand does not help with the grip) and crashing into the ocean.

I get thrashed around till I sink right in, level after level,dreaming still of the skies and soft tuffity nutmeg clouds.

But all of us cannot always land up in the clouds again, Evaporation is an extremely tough concept for some lazy people like me, ^ what like flying and then skydiving?  Seriously????? ^

Crashed and burned once already,this dream is seriously making me work. I join the army of droplets floating around lazily brushing against each other in the ocean,some of whom will end up washed up on a beach,sipping a Gin and Tonic which is actually my first LOVE before hot chocolate,and always an answer to WHAT do I want? ;) I plan to be that ‘some’, C’mon this is not a nightmare it’s a good happy ending dream. I will let my self flow with the tide, on the life raft of droplets floating gently towards the beach.

So, with sun warmed sand conducting right onto my behind and in between my toes. With one hand curling around my chilled glass and one hand in the chips packet, I feel exactly where I want to be and more so. SIGH!!!!What equation? What plan? What dream?  Just ‘In the moment’.

!!!!AND IT'S A WRAP WRAP WRAP!!!!!!!!

Rubbing my fingers softly against the smooth feel of the mound, pressing tentatively at first and then with a little pressure on it, my heart curls with thrill and as it softly compresses in, dimpling a little and then going further in ….I sigh!! Each and every time

The pleasure that courses through me via the satiny surfaces touches my joyous chords.

And each and every time, it bursts with a little phutt!!, (Now what did you think I was talking about?) I sing with every compression, I dance up and down with the sensations of pure unadulterated joy!!

 And in this case, (of course I am still talking about the bubble wrap bursting ritual)  one is just too less and I keep going phutt phutt phutt!!!.the softness, the pop. One of the only pleasures of packing.

I will one day hunt down who coined the line…for Lays and award him with a ream of bubble wrap.. “No one can eat just one.” Sheer brilliance hides in those lines.

Perfectly describing the greed that lurks under all our skins, and easily pointing out to all those who open a packet of chips, look around and if they see no one,quickly stuff three four more in their, lubricated mouths, noisily crunching away. Racing against time, and using their keen hunting prowess to train their ears to the audible signs of human presence. Quickly returning to the slow polite chew, a soft munch and a dainty pick at the first sign of company.

Will I ever tell you if I do that???From my own mouth??? Guilty only when proven, I say.

But moving back to packing.

I should tell you the idea of moving my scattered books, and the compacting of those peaks that keep getting restructured in my cupboard owing to my daily quest for clothes beginning at base camp,..Ahhh!!holds very little appeal.

My last move saw the packers form a Human chain from me at the head of the peaks down to the little unassuming shapeless, sorry square is a shape(we live in a politically correct world, god forbid I am held responsible for hurting the box’s feelings), so Yes square brown box. (There… I used the word BROWN)

Our Human chain kept feeding the box till the poor things stomach could just about manage to close its lips, and still manage to look overstuffed.

And so we moved from clothes, to shoes, to dressing table.Each time,I hopped around ignoring the rounded eyes of the packers, which were saucers due to their lack of grasping the capacity of absorbing a girls things, one tiny little room has.

I can tell you if there was a cranny I had it stacked and that day we got it packed.

I resist change in life, I am a comfort hogger,a sofa sloucher, I love watching one scenery out of my kitchen window, And when I leave a house, I say bye to the window that saw me grow up a little bit more, I cry at train stations for the thoughts I thought framed against the window, sipping hot milk now graduated to hot tea. Mostly it was all about boys I would miss, but who is counting the depth of emotions of a ten year old or a thirteen.(Though even now after fifteen years it’s still mostly about boys. extrapolate the emotional graph.)

I get attached to the dip in the mattress; I also get attached to the ritual of bathing according to particular peculiarities that are unique to each bathroom.

Surprising, but I left a house every two years, for the first 18 years of my life.

Thankfully we took our dogs with us every time or maybe I would have just planted roots and sunk them down the very same window.

I should be used to moving, but I am like I said a change resistor and what gets me through it, is the excitement awaiting at the other end.

And in all these years of moving around I have figured, if there is none at the other end, and you are just packing to move on. Move on in life, move on without your dogs, move on without the things that anchor you. Move on without the promise of an exciting day next day.Then the mundane madness, the slow boring murderous chaos of packing will effectively therapeutically, numb you top to bottom, but just, until you find the Bubble wrap beneath your fingers again.

"We saw your...$#%@#",AT THE OSCARS!!!!

Records say Seth Macfarlane is an edgy comic guy, he makes jokes, and he sells his packaging for loads of money in Hollywood.

‘we saw your boobs parody’ sold. The whole world is talking about it.

The women he mentioned are women who consciously *artistically* exhibited the B@%$#*...or is it alright if I say it because I am a woman??

Yes! we saw Charlize Therone hiding and cringing, and yes! We saw a whooping Golden Lady,Jennifer Lawrence. In all probabilities they knew about the song before. BUT, totally authentic reactions?? What is Hollywood if not make believe?

As far as the tag *sexist* goes, Fact is, that nine year old girl IS too young for George Clooney, and again its about choices she should learn the ways of Hollywood as it is a Big bad world out there. Plus we all want him, so she better face reality. So Seth did us all a favour.

There are thousands of Sexist acts and discriminations against women everyday, choosing our battles! That’s the game, And this is not even a battle it was a performance by a Comic.

That said, I personally wouldn’t want the appearance of my boobs to be sung about at the Oscars, because they are very strict about their live performances and definitely stricter about the audience.

CHEEEEESE

PHOTO BOOTH

OOOOF!!!that stitch in my stomach, wiping the stray tear out of my eyes, I stare at my friend who is crying earnestly and laughing at the same time…I turn to my third friend who is laughing and managing to still clutch on to the photo which is that proof in history, that we were at the INGO’s Saturday night bazaar in Goa. Our very own stamp on our timelines.

Strolling through a fair that throngs with life, pulsating with beats from everywhere around the world, it’s a feast of the senses, if I may relate everything to mmmm eating.

But controlling the stomach, just listen, close your eyes, and through all the music you will hear people striking deals in every language of the world.

So moving through the crowd, sometimes excused by a Russian, sometimes pardoned in french, we chance upon this activity hub.

Seeing all those people rushing through the funny costumes to the timer of ten seconds..We knew what we had come up to…all three of us instantly had that epiphany that this was what we just had to do, get into that photo booth.

So we quickly stood in queue for our ten seconds of fame, giggling in anticipation and each eyeing our costume change. I knew I had to get that wig on my head, life long desires of pink curly hair, finally coming into the view, like a runner’s first glimpse of the closing line.

 Anticipation glowing in our eyes we waited and observed the veterans already on the shoot. We observed their faults and laughed at their clumsiness, that polite awkward laugh, which hopes, we don’t look the same.

Breathing was just a notch higher, as we were given our cue.

Clutching the wigs and over sized sunglasses we trooped on the stage, waiting to be directed by the photographer, heart beating to the countdown of ten,nine, eight,seven…..

We all posed like the seventies superfloozies…though later on the Viking phase and the Minnie mouse desires overtook.

As he downed the shutter on the first shot…we ran, tumbled more like it to the changing table and scrambled around for the next coolest thing that would make us look the most foolish…

I was like a woman on a mission…I just stole whatever discards came to hand ,so one shot I was even the Warrior Viking with a penchant for heart shaped blue and pink sunglasses, talk about conflicting desires.

 However in one of the shots my curly haired friend also became Viking,fast forwarded a few centuries , pretty sorted in her  desires, she was the modern Viking.A brave warrior with an open mouthed war cry, floating around with a sign saying "like me on facebook”.

The third photo countdown mad scramble, prize would have to go to my third (first being me, straight haired,second being my curly haired friend) straight haired friend, who at first spent precious five seconds deciding, probably tapping her feet as to which colour wig would suit her best, (I guess the same desire for curly hair, germinates in her too)…deciding to be loyal to her wig she then proceeded to pick the over sized sunglasses which happened to be the coolest ones from a collection of say twenty,why you ask? Is simply because they were the only ones which saw the world through one lens.

And there the count of ‘one’ saw us clutching once again to each other as our kinetic forces fought to overcome the gravitational forces and the jolts, of each of us halting at once ,being absorbed by each other. Swaying,yet perfectly smiling into the camera for our third and final shot.

As it flashed into our eyes and ears resonating with the booming voice of our photographers megaphone, we put our hearts into that effortless smile, because it ‘bubbled’ up from every charged up cell in our system.

We even convinced the photographer that we didn't need more than one copy of our moment of memory making, because we were all technically aware of the world of scanning, the look the guy gave us was purely writing us off as scammers…but when you are on shoestring you really are on shoestrings, so who cares about peoples faces, they are too high up anyway!!!!focus on the shoestrings, and keep sidling past people.

Our high continued on to the table that was held on to bravely by our straight haired friend who in an overcrowded common, open air eating place fought hard to mark our territory on the bench, that was being invaded by an amorous old man, bending in to inflame, a much younger woman on his side, poking my friend with his amply carved camel hump back. Bravo sweety!!!!she held her space till we were all well fed and watered. Relinquishing, only to find more time for a stroll through the colorful stalls. Everything was begging us to save them from the rule of the mean women manning the stalls.We however were not economically placed to do that, but there were a few rescue attempts made, some successful, and some ended in us being batted out by the old bat women.

Overall our march out, was a relatively Victorious one.

The story of what we did with the soft drinks that were not allowed in has to be a tale on its own…FOR NOW CHEEESE!!!!!

Rapunzel Rapunzel!!!

Let down you hair,Let down your hair

Rapunzel, Rapunzel,

Let Down your hair.

As I sit with four round pink curlers untidily put in my just there wet black(I wish long Tresses),

Moving around my face as the breeze whispers into them,I imagine removing that one naughty strand that moves in to tease my eyes.

My eyes staring out in the distance with long dreamy gaze,sheltered by the shades of thick lashes.

You get the image!!

Now coming back to reality,and wintry garden of my Hair,my biggest dilemma is that did the hairstylist say,put the curlers in when the hair is wet or did he say when they were dry,Now you would wonder why are these small details even worth noting,for in my little life yes they are.See I am the person who picks up Hair Mousse thinking its Hair Spray.

Thankfully my mother in her unknowing genetic kindness passed on her good hair,straight,slightly wavy,gene to me,making  me the washed and just perfect girl.

However promptly after passing on that gene,she proceeded to play doll for a few years and I pranced around with ribbons in my two little Plats or maybe on the day ,side ponies.

I lived this carefree,mummy will make my hair existence till probably I started dividing three digits and taking out fractions.

Then came the BIG CHOP.Now Ideally I should remember the eventful day but it evades my memory,probably hiding away behind the hair that fell off that day...or maybe my ignorance did not let me make a memory.

Whichever way you see,I have loads of memories of ending up being bundled under the same scissors as my brother would.I also remember not giving it a second thought at the time...my biggest concern being the after haircut mandatory shower ,to save your self the pricks of the numerous hair sliding under your clothes,through the barbers carelessly loose drape.

It only started to sink in when I was automatically elected the boy to be,in all the school dances,come to think of it even when my hair was longer,they elected me ,and I must add I  made a very chic, single pony guy.imagine black suit and bow tie...

Have you ever had short hair for a long period of time?

I am still trying to figure out if I minded really,the idea was to dance and if I could shake a leg disguised like a boy,hidden behind mustaches,then I would still do it today.So no I have decided my desire for longer hair today probably stems from periodic starvation of seeing my self,unconsciously put them behind my ears.

Transporting me back to today,as I sit all curled up under my round curlers, after four years of short crop,today seeing me happily experiment with new hairstyles,the desire for longer hair quenched and conveniently now transmuted into sighing after curly tresses!!!You know the kinds that tumble past,etc. etc.

Will I get tired of the curler phase,will I finish that bottle of Mousse?because deep down I think all this is just a waste of time,but it doesn't stop me from giving yearning looks to all those curly hair that seem to just be floating in front of my eyes...Long or short I control,but this business of curlers.Sigh!!!sometimes a small part of me whispers, the Lazy in me will get the better of my desire to flaunt those curls.

Then maybe I will go back to sighing,pasting a smile of genuine appreciation of beauty so different to mine,and complimenting those ladies who promptly compliment me back with a "I wish I had your Straight falling hair".

Considering the widespread, Conclusion is that , this problem is endemic to the Homo Sapien Species.

So now I decide I can pin my fluctuating desires on the basic fault in the composition of us beings.Now if Human Beings were a contended species why would I want what I do not have,butttt then maybe all the Salons would be out of their expensive businesses of Hair straightening and Perming.

So my desires are for the greater good,in total conformity with my neighbours and their neighbours, So I can stop trying to figure out the intricacies of my ambitions. I also stop short of pinning myself a philanthropist,because I am But a human,albeit totally Lazy!and have yet to patronize a Salon for their curling abilities.

So this is Lazy (momentarily contended)Dreamy, Happy's time to go and take those curlers off,till the scissor trigger doesn't  strike again.

SAVDHANI HATI...DURGHATNA GHATI!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUUU....my dear dear darling brother...my day began with singing and midway through, my song got bruised...ended with a real full stomach and the song was very very contended.

I LOVE wishing people throughout the day,and I have never seriously,really, given it a thought about whether this is a sadistic age reminding mechanism,or just the sweetHEART in me.:))

So far we have established it was my brother's birthday (I wish I had written this the day it happened,with my stellar memory three months seems like a blunting influence)

However.

I get dressed, I'm meeting the parents,the sister in law and the BIRTHDAY BOY,all of us merging from different paths...to meet up at this lovely restaurant which prided itself with a roof top and lovely Chinese cuisine.

In the day what I had already done to make history was,I met an old old  friend at the mall,wore REALLY OLD sandals,which in my defense didn't appear torn in the house,though in the bright sunshiny day,they were really tattered man.

And every body,my parents can be excused for shortsightedness...(leaving decidedly guilty few) didn't think of mentioning that I was dropping bits off my sandals as I squiggled along the shiny marble mall floor...HUMPHHH!!!!

Any way my jaw got stuck, as I flashed my new watch and preened for a photo...

*what ensued was of course a shopping detour...*

That sorted,we decided to take my friend up on his recommendation(I mentioned we bumped into him,right?)

Seated at this restaurant...around a table I suddenly am struck by inspiration, that it would be a great idea to have a cake...and of course it had to be a surprise...

The mission demanded stealth and speed.

So  I tasked my super efficient friend,who I should mention was floating around with a woman superbly prepped up by a salon for two hours,leaving my friend to drown himself in two beers, sufficient to blurrr her final tadaaan!!effect..sweet girl.

 I muttered something and pushed off with a phone to my ear.

Running down the stairs...I turned,...and I could suddenly feel an equal and opposite push,which started with my cheeks.BAMM!!!

It took me a micro second to process the damn glass...and as is the case with my savdhani hati,durghatna ghati situation...there were these lovely waiters and diners...(the diners thankfully had the decency to hide their smiles...)to witness my collision.

so with my hand to cheek...I march on..my  mission is not forgotten..

I look at the other diners apologetically just wanting to run out of the restaurant,so I just stare ahead...
Focus!!on the Mission...

I can still remember the light pouring in from the big glass of the mall....and then BAMMMMM....

I MEAN WHO CLOSES the DAMM GLASS DOOR ????????IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AFTERNOOOON????

should I also tell you the damage area...same cheek bone...which was now radiating angry red colour,and my face was radiating well...my mouth spoke before anything...
I  turned and told whoever was interested,which was everyone actually..."This when I haven't even drunk anything"..

I made the quickest exit possible..hoping and praying the diners change by the time I'm back.

In the end I got a red carpet welcome,the kind waiters held the doors wide open for me,BOTH of them.